I wish my apartment was a TV show.

It would be a great sitcom. Every other night or so two to four of my roomies go to a workout class like hyper kick or yoga or piyo (pilates and yoga, apparently). When they come back, we get a reenactment of the class and how weird the teacher is every time. Then there is Caroline, who gets in these crazy moods and usually ends up serenading us or starting a singalong. Or a shouting match. We get obsessed and bond over shows together (Felicity and South of Nowhere, I'm lookin' at you) and then we relate everything to the current show of our lives. Everything. We don't even do it on purpose. We have two art majors who are usually working on something really weird, an english major who writes poetry against her will all the time, two elementary education majors (I think?) and a freshman from Canada. Speaking of which, our Canadian resident loves to hang up the other art major's homework on the fridge and on the walls all the time and it drives her crazy (she'd hang mine up too but I haven't really had anything two dimensional yet). Speaking of the walls, they are a total melting pot of all the decorations everyone has.

And then the fridge. (there are 6 of us in case you lost count) 6 gallons of milk, even though I don't drink milk. At least 4 jars of salsa at all times. Tons of cheese. 4 or 5 bottles of ranch dressing, pretty much everyone has their own butter too. If you open the freezer, you will be buried in an avalanche of garlic chicken pasta stuff. In the cupboards, thousands of dishes. I think if we were all horrible dish doers, we could go a month. I could go on about the 1:1 ratio of hair straighteners to girls but yeah. I dunno I'm just a little entertained by all of this.

So I read on MLIA that if you rub garlic on the bottom of your foot you can taste it 15 minutes later.

Does this mean that if I were to stick my tongue to the bottom of my foot for a little while I'd be able to taste my tongue? Also, is that why everybody's parents always want their kids to wear clean socks? I guess I can see how your day would be improved by tasting clean socks through your feet instead of dirty ones. Maybe THIS is why I am always happier on the days that I am wearing brand new socks.

How come our feet get to taste things?? I can't help but wonder if this works on other parts of the body. I don't think it works on the armpits, however, or else that girl we paid 10 bucks to lick the stick of deodorant that we found in the locker room on the floor freshman year would have been much much happier about it afterwards. I would imagine that all the things that smell really good but taste horrible (shampoo and perfume anyone?) would taste really good. Heck, I'm sure that if we could taste stuff through all of our skin everything would be delicious and probably edible. Just a thought.

Ok, new year's resolution.

I don't usually bother with new year's resolutions, it seems to me like to make the resolution is to doom the effort. But I'm gonna make this one. And yeah I know I'm a little late but I've been a grump this year. I just wanna say, by the way, that I hate this year a whole lot more than last year so far. Although the first month of last year wasn't all that hot either. I've been reading mylifeisaverage.com in an effort to find some life inspiration lately and I've decided that this year I plan on putting forth a concerted effort to make my life average like these people's lives.

So there was a demon in my sunday school class today.

I came home for the weekend. There is a woman in my home ward who is very hard of hearing yet insists on sitting on the back row in relief society. I found this out today, and that is why people have been shouting into the microphone giving me a headache in relief society last month when I was home. They also have begun passing the mic around when people have comments which, as you might imagine, slows down the flow of the lesson considerably. Because of this, the bishop got somebody in the ward to set up 2 wireless mics that could be handed around. Should be good, right? Well, it is except for the part where we were blissfully listening to the lesson (as blissfully as one can listen to a lesson whilst people are shouting into the mic), suddenly, the most piercing, horrible noise graced the ears of everybody in the room. It was later described by my sister as the sound of demons, screaming in some nonunderstandable language like the mermaids in Harry Potter, "NO! DON'T TEACH ABOUT THISSSSSS!" Moments after the noise stopped, a thin, sad little wail came from the child across the aisle from me. This happened two more times during class. We decided it had to do with the bell system in the building.

I'm starting a petition to get this woman to sit in the front row.

Okay, so impressions of my new classes or whatever.

First off, on Monwedfri, I have Nutrition. That's it. One class. 12:30 not bad huh? Well, according to what the teacher says it's one of the highest risk classes on campus. Depending on what you think that means I have a high chance of being murdered, or a high chance of failing because it's tricky. Actually both. I mean, this class has 400 people in it so... The more people there are the more likely I am to get murdered right? I kid you not, this is one of those GIANT auditoriums and every seat literally is filled. People I know keep coming up to me and telling me I'm in that class with them. I'm not all that surprised. Have to get an i clicker, should be the best fun I ever have getting it.

And then on Tuthursdays, I have introduction to basic sculpture bright and early at 9 with AJ (my roomie for those of you not up on the lingo.) I am absolutely not taking it from the guy who taught my 3-D design class, much as I actually eventually liked the class, I just can't wanna make a double life size sculpture of my own head. Instead I'm making a life sized one. Can't really wanna do that either, but I don't really have a choice. There is one of those odd guys who is completely separate from the human race in that class. I got the feeling that if I took my phone out and started texting he would make outrageous amounts of commentary about it so I tested my theory. He did. "You kids and your cell phones... I can always tell when someone is straight out of high school because they know how to text." Weird thing is, this guy is not that old looking. I mean, 25 maybe? Not much older than that. Jin Man Jo is our teacher, he's from China or thereabouts. Very very thick accent. This will be fun.

After that, Intermediate Racquetball. Me and Cappy signed up for it because there's no squash class and I do not wanna take tennis. Why intermediate? Because I hear it's stupid easy and a lot like squash and the beginner class was full. So we get there yesterday and the teacher informs us that she's just gonna let us play, pretty much and that if we want her to teach us something she can but she'll have to look it up because she doesn't play. Cue raucous laughter from our corner of the room. This should be fun.

If all goes according to plan, I'll be in the first half of art history soon. If this happens, I will be at school for a total of 12 hours on thursdays thanks to my seminar class on Thursdays that is from 6 to 9. Oh joy.

We'll just play it by ear and see how this goes...

There's something about goggle foam.

Something about the smell of it is just so nostalgic to me. It's another of my favorite smells. A little better for me probably than some of my aforementioned favorites. (I also like the smell of gasoline, by the way. Don't think I mentioned that one. Reminds me of exploding out of the car at every rest stop in Nephi, St. George, Somewhere after Vegas, Some Miscellaneous Town in California I Can't think of, and Newport Beach every year when I was growing up. Also countless other road trips but I am off subject so I will stop speaking parenthetically.)

Back on subject though, this metal piece that is really more decoration than anything fell off the side of my goggles sometime last month and I was lucky enough to be taking them off at the time and therefore I noticed and held on to it. It's been driving me crazy for a while, but tonight I remembered so I could superglue it back on. So I did. After I pried at the piece a bit and shook the goggles on to test the bond, I then put them on. What? I love wearing goggles.

Anyways, I put them on and immediately got this glorious whiff of goggle foam. Somehow the whole coat closet in my house smells like it, even though there are only a couple of pairs in there and like 100 coats. This smell pulls me right on back to when I was 4 or 5 and there was nothing in the world I loved more than putting on my mom's goggles, the very ones that now hang off of my rearview mirror, and charging through the house, pretending I was a superhero. Or that everything was on fire. The lenses are orange, you know. For some reason, those goggles have always really really smelled like goggle foam. Whether it's because my face was too small and the foam squished on my nose or because I always wore them inside, I don't know, because goggles these days for sure have even more foam to them. But I usually don't get to smell the smell when I am boarding. Perhaps it is because there is so much good about snowboarding that some of them get dropped off the list of things I'm noticing.

Or maybe it is because my ninja mask is ready to get washed bleah. It has dragon breath.

Ok here's the plan.

No wait, first things first, I got a pony for Christmas, expect more on that at a later date when I have had more of an opportunity to ride it.

Back to business. Speaking of business, I have
figured out the plan for my life.
1. Find a boy who falls madly in love with me.
2. Hopefully fall madly in love with him and become married.
3. if step 2 fails, repeat until successful.
4. Kiss him copiously.
5. Buy a little piece of land.
6. Build a laundromat, preferably near a college campus, I bet business would be fairly booming.
7. Don't forget to build a little apartment in the back of said laundromat.
8. Continue with all the educations during all of this, of course.
9. Live in the little apartment behind the laundromat, be the happiest little couple ever because who could ever not be happy whilst basking in the wonderful smell of laundry?
10. Create art out of scrap metal or something on the side, as supplemental income. I dunno, be creative.

Should be good, yeah?